Friday, August 31, 2007

Abused and Manipuated

Camp is hard work. Sweating in the summer heat, never getting much of a break, living in conditions that aren't exactly luxurious. And as hard as camp is, home is feeling much worse. I have spent the past 3 days trying to get my home organized and set for the school year, and prepared for another quick vacation. I'm doing laundry, paying bills, consolidating paperwork, loading the dishwasher, unloading the dishwasher, feeding the dogs, walking the dogs folding the clothes, preparing meals, grocery trips, etc. etc.

Since we've returned home, the girls are having a grand time chilling with there friends, on the computer, watching movies, inviting people over, etc. etc.

I ask them to help, and, indeed, I might get cursory assistance, but nothing really substantial. I would like to not have to ask them to help, but I have to. My oldest then tells me that I am really strict, and mean, and always asking for her to do something.

I'm so frustrated, I'm not even unpacked from camp yet, and the work keeps mounting. The piles get bigger, and as soon as I complete one task, another has appeared while my back was turned.

I feel abused. I know that is a strong word, but that is the depth of my feelings right now. I feel my girls take advantage of the fact that if they don't put the glass in the dishwasher, I will. When my little one goes outside, suddenly we have 2 more kids in the house, who appear out of nowhere. I even had a four year old neighborhood kid tell me, (and this is an EXACT quote) "That's it, I'm never coming back here", when I refused to drop what I was doing to go look at a bug in the basement.

My oldest begged for two girlfriends to sleep over the house last night. I repeatedly said NO, as I wanted her to get rest for our upcoming weekend. I finally gave in, (accidentally), as long as they went to bed early, and had their mom's pick them up at 10:00 am. Then I had to arrange dinner for the extra two girls I ended up with.

I'm not kidding when I tell you that these girls stayed up til 6:30 am, laughing out loud the whole night. I found my cell phone sitting by the computer next to an open phone book. They were making phoney phone calls ON MY PHONE through-out the night. My refrigerator was emptied with their middle of the night snacking. They then didn't leave until 12:45, almost three hours AFTER I asked them to leave.

Then my daughter, who I'm furious with, has the audacity to tell me that I'm mean and that all of her friends think so. She also told me, that these two in particular are afraid of me. Good.

I'm so tired of getting pissed upon. I'm so tired of being the only one in a house of five who takes responsibility. I'm so tired. I'm soooo tired. I just want to cry.

I don't know how to discipline them. I don't know what I'm doing. I'm don't know if I'm doing a good job.

I want to raise responsible, giving and thoughtful people. I don't know if I can.

Monday, August 27, 2007

On the subject of Vacation


While I'm thinking about vacation, I thought I'd post a memory of a vacation my family and I took in what I believe was about 1974. I was 10, Wendi would be 13 (?), and we went to Lancaster County, PA. The Amish farmhouse we visited was memorable...probably because of this photo.

Anyway, I think my dad was first becoming interested in photography when this photo was taken. I remember feeling very fashionable in my halter and bandana. Dig the belly fat, especially. Wendi was not pointing at anything in particular, just pointing, to make the picture more interesting. I think Wendi is wearing shorts under that t-shirt (at least I hope she is), and I'm not sure why I needed a pocketbook at that age.

Oh my, I loved my big sister, and felt so cool and grown up to be hanging with her. Here are my two oldest girls taken 2 days ago. Will they look back on this picture 3o(plus) years from now and think how funny it is? Probably. But aren't they lucky to have the memory of special time with a sister. Just like me.

Sunday, August 26, 2007

Having a Great Time, Wish You Were Here

So many things about vacation have changed since we were kids. We used to disappear for a week, perhaps send a postcard to say hello. Photos were taken using our 35mm film, and reviewed a few days upon return (if you remembered to have them processed). Car trips, when we were kids, were long and boring, and consisted of fighting over which radio station to listen to, and looking out the window to amuse ourselves. Speaking by phone to anyone was next to impossible, unless you wanted to pay outrageous fees to your hotel

My how things have changed. We can talk to our hearts content via our cell phones, check our e-mail on our wireless laptops, and update our facebook account (another story, another blog post). We can edit our photos on the same day, and create home movies that rival Spielberg (okay, Harry Spielberg, not Steven, but you get the picture). Car trips are a highlight these days, between i-pods, game boys and dvd players in the car. Trips are no longer measured in miles, but in how many movies. (i.e. it takes 7 movies to get to Florida; 1 movie to drive to the shore; 3 movies til Virgina, etc.)

I could write now about how much I miss the old days, how vacations have lost there purity. How my children should foster their imaginations by looking out the window. How we should bond as a family by simply talking. (Which we do a lot of). But...I'm on vacation. I don't really feel like being on serious, that's for the other 51 weeks of the year. Below is a little movie of our 2nd day in town. Boring to most, but I love it. :)

Thursday, August 16, 2007

What I Did This Summer


Actually, this is what I did the last week of camp. We had our annual banquet, and this year's theme was "Grease". Over the years that I have been at camp the banquet has morphed into a huge undertaking. My staff and I spend the last week of camp making decorations, centerpieces and preparing for this one special night.

This year was amazing. We had a great presentation, that I think the campers just loved. My wonderfully beautiful and talented staff performed a dance to "We Go Together", in costumes they made themselves. Our decorations and centerpieces were fantastic,but I must admit, I'm most proud of a little movie This is one of our centerpieces (we made 35 total) that I worked on with my friend Caryl.
The "milkshake" is NOT real...how cool is that?



we put together, a parody of Grease, starring many of our upper staff members in key roles.

I must say, that when I began this endeavor, I was so nervous that I wouldn't get cooperation from those I recruited to participate. After all, everyone is so busy at camp, and moments of frivolity are hard to come by. I must admit I felt rather presumptuous expecting people to step out of their routine, not to mention their comfort zone. I couldn't have been more wrong. Every one was so enthusiastic and excited by this project.

I was doubly blessed by having our camp Program Coordinator take over most of the editing of the movie. Thank heavens, because the editing of this movie is SPECTACULAR!!!

Anyway, I'm so excited to share the youtube link with you, please check it out. I'm so proud of this!!!

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Home Sweet Home

We made through a wonderful summer, and now we are all safe and sound, and home. This was a successful summer for all of us, though I think very hard on my husband. Going from a bustling, busy house, to an empty one, for 8 full weeks must be very tough after the first two days. His support for our camp lifestyle is unwavering and I'm so thankful.

In November, 2002, when I was first offered the position at camp, I remember telling Gregg, that this wasn't just about the upcoming summer, instead this was about a lifestyle choice, We would not have ordinary summers that I had expected for our family. No weekend barbecues, no day trips to the zoo, museums or even the dog park. No (very inexpensive) community day camp for the girls; no staying inside in air-conditioned comfort on those days where its not the heat, it's the humidity; no bells jingling from the ice cream man, no lemonade stands. We wouldn't have our daily trek to our nearby beach, no hosing down of sand off of little piggies. No setting up a plastic pool, and watching all the neighborhood children magically appear in bathing suits and flip-flops.

And as I have mentioned before, leaving each year, is heartbreaking. I'm never ready to leave my home, I usually feel like, I just want to have a summer like normal people, though by the end of camp, I feel proud and invigorated that my hard work, and dedication have resulted in my daughters truly enjoying picture perfect summers.

I now consider myself lucky. How many other 40-something women do you know that get to spend their two months in summer camp? I get to be the fly on the wall that we all would now and then like to be. And the campers, not just my own children, but all of the children, that I have now watched grow up, I get to share in their joys and accomplishments. And whether they sing a beautiful song in a talent show, perform in a play, win a competition or are given a special award for their hard work, I cheer proudly, like I would for my own.

I always knew, for sure, that camp is great for my children, but what I didn't expect was that it would be great for our whole family. We are a special little community at camp. Working long days, giggling, sweating, creating, and having fun. We learn we have more potential than we ever thought possible, and that by just working hard, we make beautiful friendships. We learn that kindness goes a long way, and that when dealing with people, patience and understanding are key. We make mistakes everyday, and learn to deal with them, and we can make something wonderful out of very little.

I know this doesn't make a lot of sense, as this is more a stream of consciousness type post than i normally write. Forgive me, I'm tired and it's sooooooo late.

Anyway, glad to be back in the real world!

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

Color War Fun

The camp is in the midst of color war, which, to the camping world, is THE major event of the summer. The camp is divided into two teams, and they compete in a myriad of events and competitions. Addison took part on her teams little dance team, and I thought you would enjoy sneaking a peak at my little star. (If it doesn't load right away, it only means that you tube hasn't finished processing, and you are on this blog much more quickly than I had anticipated.

If you still don't see it, search youtube.com for "Lilshish" and a list of my videos will come up...

xoxoxo

Monday, August 6, 2007

I'll Make this Quick

I cannot believe we have only a little more than a week before we come home....HOW DID THIS SUMMER FLY LIKE THIS???

I just want to tell my kids to look around, this is all going to be a memory, so treasure every moment we have.

I have the best job, I'm having a wonderful time, and it's great to be part of something so special. Unless you've experienced it yourself, it's hard to understand. But I am so blessed to be able to share the camp experience with my children, and spend my time working with wonderful, energetic and brilliant young people.

I'm looking forward to being home, but I'm really going to miss my summer home....