A Year of Colic

Last year, on the day before Mother's Day, I wrote my first blog entry. I set out to write a blog slightly different from what it has morphed into. I initially thought, I wouldn't share this with anyone. I wanted to simply journal my feelings day to day.

I learned in this year, that writing is the ultimate therapy. Feelings I didn't know I had bubble up to the surface when I'm writing. I find myself experiencing life, and then thinking, "I need to blog about that". It's not really about communicating, but more about sorting out my thoughts, and then organizing them in a fashion that helps me make sense of my journey.

Heidi asked me last night if I was okay if my children read my blog. I am. In fact, I wouldn't write anything on this blog that I wouldn't share with them. In fact, I think my blog would be far more compelling if I threw caution to the wind, and spoke about EVERYthing. But I am protective of my girls, and I reveal just enough to be therapeutic, but not enough to be a complete embarrassment! When I need to sort out the more private stuff, I have my husband, mother, sister and girlfriends to confide in.

I kept a journal for many years when I was a teen and in my early twenties. I loved journaling back then for the simple fact that sometimes I just didn't feel like I wanted to burden anyone with my drama. And I always felt like in the end, I would have written my own personal history books.

That has become the function in blog-land, except these history books will be here forever, their pages won't tatter and they won't get covered with dust in a box in the attic.

I've made friends, learned some life lessons, had the opportunity to share with family and friends, and have touched people on the other side of the world.

The day before mother's day was a good day to begin this journey, one year ago. And I am learning that my theme, "Colic was Easier" is a metaphor for our natural longing for the "good old days". Things always look sweeter and simpler in hindsight. It's like how women who have given birth always say they don't remember the pain. I think we can all try to remember that when times are challenging. One day, I'm sure, I will look back on these days, the days that made my hair gray, and think, those days were nothing compared to this.

I guess, we just need to savor every moment of our lives. Because, as the song says, "these ARE the good old days."

Peace.