Abused and Manipuated

Camp is hard work. Sweating in the summer heat, never getting much of a break, living in conditions that aren't exactly luxurious. And as hard as camp is, home is feeling much worse. I have spent the past 3 days trying to get my home organized and set for the school year, and prepared for another quick vacation. I'm doing laundry, paying bills, consolidating paperwork, loading the dishwasher, unloading the dishwasher, feeding the dogs, walking the dogs folding the clothes, preparing meals, grocery trips, etc. etc.

Since we've returned home, the girls are having a grand time chilling with there friends, on the computer, watching movies, inviting people over, etc. etc.

I ask them to help, and, indeed, I might get cursory assistance, but nothing really substantial. I would like to not have to ask them to help, but I have to. My oldest then tells me that I am really strict, and mean, and always asking for her to do something.

I'm so frustrated, I'm not even unpacked from camp yet, and the work keeps mounting. The piles get bigger, and as soon as I complete one task, another has appeared while my back was turned.

I feel abused. I know that is a strong word, but that is the depth of my feelings right now. I feel my girls take advantage of the fact that if they don't put the glass in the dishwasher, I will. When my little one goes outside, suddenly we have 2 more kids in the house, who appear out of nowhere. I even had a four year old neighborhood kid tell me, (and this is an EXACT quote) "That's it, I'm never coming back here", when I refused to drop what I was doing to go look at a bug in the basement.

My oldest begged for two girlfriends to sleep over the house last night. I repeatedly said NO, as I wanted her to get rest for our upcoming weekend. I finally gave in, (accidentally), as long as they went to bed early, and had their mom's pick them up at 10:00 am. Then I had to arrange dinner for the extra two girls I ended up with.

I'm not kidding when I tell you that these girls stayed up til 6:30 am, laughing out loud the whole night. I found my cell phone sitting by the computer next to an open phone book. They were making phoney phone calls ON MY PHONE through-out the night. My refrigerator was emptied with their middle of the night snacking. They then didn't leave until 12:45, almost three hours AFTER I asked them to leave.

Then my daughter, who I'm furious with, has the audacity to tell me that I'm mean and that all of her friends think so. She also told me, that these two in particular are afraid of me. Good.

I'm so tired of getting pissed upon. I'm so tired of being the only one in a house of five who takes responsibility. I'm so tired. I'm soooo tired. I just want to cry.

I don't know how to discipline them. I don't know what I'm doing. I'm don't know if I'm doing a good job.

I want to raise responsible, giving and thoughtful people. I don't know if I can.